Mum gets her RNLI Gold Badge

My mum has been raising money for the RNLI for almost as long as I can remember. For many years she was Treasurer of the local RNLI committee, before taking on the role of Chair this year. We were all delighted and immensely proud to learn a few months ago that she had been awarded the prestigious RNLI Gold Badge which she would receive at a ceremony at the Barbican.  Along with two of her colleagues, she received coverage in the local press for her well-deserved award.

The RNLI might not seem like an obvious interest for a seven year old living in landlocked Birmingham but, largely thanks to his Grandma's influence, J has a real interest in lifeboats and lifeguards. He is a member of Storm Force, the Lifeboat club for children, and waits eagerly for the next edition of the Storm Force magazine to arrive.  Our holidays to the coast are not complete without trips to visit the local lifeboat stations. During our last holiday we were lucky enough to have a guided tour of the all weather lifeboat in Fowey and J was so excited.

So what perfect timing that J's school was closed for polling day on 22 May 2014, the day of Grandma's presentation!

We squeezed in a bit of sightseeing

That day we were up early for our train to London so that we could fit in a bit of sightseeing before the awards ceremony.  This was J's first sightseeing trip to London and top of his list were Buckingham Palace and Big Ben. By chance, we timed it perfectly and even saw the changing of the guard.

After a quick bite to eat and a ride on the circle line it was time for the ceremony at the Barbican.

The stage is set and the Guest of Honour arrives

The ceremony kicked off with an inspiring film showing some of the many rescues carried out by the RNLI during 2013.  I couldn't help but be astounded by the bravery of the volunteer lifeboat crews. Some of the weather conditions shown in the film were atrocious. When most people would retreat indoors, the crews don their kits and head out in storms, gale force winds and terrifying waves. What a truly amazing and courageous bunch of people!

Before the presentation of the Gold Badges, there were five special awards: Innovation, Youth, Branch, Corporate and Media. The well-known artist, Tracey Emin, was presented with the Innovation Award for her collaboration with restaurateur, James Stephenson, which involved Tracey painting and auctioning a watercolour which raised £100,000 for the RNLI.

Tracey Emin receiving her Innovation Award

J likes to dress appropriately

My mum received her Gold Badge from the Guest of Honour, Torbay coxswain Mark Criddle, who received an RNLI medal for gallantry in 2008 following his leadership of a daring two-hour rescue of 8 crew members from a stricken cargo ship. The details of the rescue are breathtaking. The cargo ship was listing at a 45 degree angle and, in severe gale force 9 winds, the crew had to make over 50 attempts to get the lifeboat in a position alongside the cargo ship where the 8 crew members could be persuaded to jump from their ship to the lifeboat. Without the efforts of the lifeboat crew, all 8 cargo ship crew would have perished.

I can think of no better person to present mum's medal than a decorated RNLI hero. After all, that is what it is all about  - all the events mum has organised over the years, all the money she has raised with her committee - it has all been for one reason, to ensure that RNLI crews have the equipment and resources they need to save lives.

Well done mum! You thoroughly deserve your award and you have made us all very proud.

Mum's big moment 

Celebrity photo-bombing

Susie's Big Brew - The Day Arrives

Getting ready for the Big Brew

Friday 16 May was the day of my "Big Brew" to raise money for Pregnancy Sickness Support, the charity of which I am a trustee.  This was the culmination of my Pregnancy Sickness Support Awareness Roadshow which I started way back in August as part of the charity's Nine Months Of Campaign.

In the week running up to my Big Brew, I spent most evenings in the kitchen baking.  I would have liked to involve the children (and I did feel a little guilty for not doing, knowing how much they love baking) but I just didn't manage to find time during the day when they were around. On the plus side, I discovered that the benefit of late night baking is that, with no greedy little ones around, I got to scrape the bowl out all by myself!

In total, I made more than 60 cupcakes as well as several lemon drizzle and chocolate and orange drizzle cakes. Now, I would certainly not describe myself as a "Mary Berry" - my culinary talents are generally brought out twice a year for the children's birthdays - but I actually quite enjoyed it. Unlike last year (when my show stopper went horribly wrong as the mixture leaked out of my spring loaded tins), there were no major dramas and I was pleased with the results.

Big Brew Number 1 - Pop in and Play

The first event of the day was a cake sale at my local playgroup, Pop in and Play.  I have blogged about Pop in and Play before as this was where I started my Pregnancy Sickness Awareness Roadshow all those months ago.

I had no idea how many cakes would appear, or even if people had heard the announcement the week before as the children impatiently waited for the Music Man to start his rendition of "Old MacDonald had a cow ... with a quack quack here ... etc." which always goes down a treat.

I was overwhelmed by the number of cakes people brought and the amount of effort that people had clearly put in to making some beautiful cakes.  Most of the cakes were home made and I was touched that all these busy mums had taken the time out of their day to make cakes to support a charity so close to my own heart.

Loadsa cakes!

Some were almost too pretty to eat

Not many left by the end

Big Brew Number 2

After Big Brew Number 1, it was a quick dash home to whiz round with the hoover and finish off a few other jobs before Big Brew Number 2 kicked off at my house the same afternoon.

I was blessed with sunny weather and delighted at how many of my wonderful friends and neighbours came along for a cuppa, some cake and a natter. It really was a lovely afternoon.

Counting up

I enlisted the services of a little accountant to assist with counting all the money - and a very good job he did too!

My trainee accountant

In total, I raised £237. Beforehand, I had said I would love to raise more than I did last year which was £140. I didn't expect to raise almost £100 more!

So I would like to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who supported my Big Brew by coming along, baking or buying cakes and for helping to make the day a big success. I couldn't have done it without you!

Same time next year?

International Hyperemesis Gravidarum Awareness Day

Tomorrow is International Hyperemesis Gravidarum Awareness Day and the culmination of my Nine Months Of challenge to raise awareness and funds for Pregnancy Sickness Support.  When I embarked on my challenge, I planned to mark International HG Awareness Day by holding a coffee morning as I did last year. Little did I know that I would be joined by volunteers across the country who are also holding coffee mornings and tea parties to raise awareness and money for the charity. I am very proud that I was involved in launching the first ever "Big Brew - Getting together for Pregnancy Sickness Support" and I really hope that this will become a successful, annual event for the charity.

I have been very busy this week baking cakes and the next two days will be even busier. Tomorrow I will be taking cakes to work to sell, and also sending some with my husband (and I have more baking to do this evening!).  Then on Friday, I have not one but two Big Brew events. The first will be at the play group I usually attend where the lovely ladies have kindly agreed to run a cake sale for me, and the second will be at my house in the afternoon.  I am really looking forward to getting together with all my friends for a cuppa, some cake and a good old gossip.

Last year, I raised £140 at my coffee morning thanks to the very generous support of friends, family and neighbours. I would dearly love to top that figure this year.

So please, please consider donating.  The charity receives no external funding and relies entirely on donations to be able to provide essential support to sufferers and their families.  You can donate by clicking here. Thank you. 

Ready, steady, bake!

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I had a little weep the other day …

I was playing with my little girl the other day and we were having lots of fun. She was giggling and messing about with my hair, I was giving her lots of cuddles and kisses and the sun was shining.  She is at such a lovely age.  She is chatty and can sometimes be quite gown-up in her conversations (think 3 going on 33!), she is giggly with a funny sense of humour and we have lovely pretend play moments usually involving her making me cups of coffee and cake and playing at "Costa" (I have absolutely no idea where she gets that from).

It suddenly occurred to me that when my son was the same age this was when I started to be ill with hyperemesis gravidarum (HG) in the very early stages of my pregnancy.  From that point onwards, until about 6 months into my pregnancy, I was so ill that I was unable to look after myself, let alone my son, and I had to rely on huge amounts of support from family and friends.

The reason I cried? Because I realised that this was the period in my son’s life that I missed out on and during which I was not there for him as a mum should be.  It was a very tough time and one during which I felt immense guilt at not being able to look after my son. 

I remember one particularly low moment for both of us.  My mum was bathing my son and he was crying and shouting “mummy, mummy”.  I was lying in bed, listening helplessly to his distress, too ill and weak to get out of bed to go to him.  He was only a few feet away and yet I was unable to help him and comfort him. When my mum brought him to the bedroom after his bath, he lay on the bed with me, we hugged each other and I cried and cried.

But hindsight is a wonderful thing and I now know many things that I didn’t know then.

I now know that children are very resilient, more resilient than we often give them credit for.  They have an amazing capacity to bounce back from difficult times quicker and stronger than we imagine.

I now know that my “absence” as a mother didn’t have as profound an effect on my son as it did on me.  I have had the occasional flashback to the trauma of HG (when something has triggered a memory as it did the other day), but I don’t believe my son remembers much (if anything) about that time, apart from the little anecdotes we have told him since, such as how he would rub my back when I was vomiting and how he once pleaded with me not to “sick the baby up”.

I now know that my son benefited enormously from spending more time with other family members, such as my parents and my husband, than he would have done had I not been ill.  My husband did pretty much everything for our son while I was ill and my own mum was amazing, travelling from Lancashire on numerous occasions to care for me and her grandson.  As a result they have formed close bonds that will last a lifetime. 

I now know that, even though my pregnancy seemed like an eternity to me at the time, my period of illness was relatively short in the context of my son’s life.  He is already seven and hasn’t suffered any adverse effects from the whole experience.  I have years ahead of me to give both my children the time, love and attention that I so desperately wanted to give to my son then but simply couldn’t.

Of course, there is also one huge positive to come out of the whole experience and that is that my son now has a gorgeous little sister and the bond between them is something very special indeed. Yes, they squabble, but they also join in each other’s imaginary games; hold hands across the back seat of the car; plan where they will live together when they are grown-up and no longer live with mummy and daddy; make dens together under the dining room table; cuddle up under a blanket when they are watching television; wash (and splash!) each other in the bath and climb into each other’s beds in the morning before we get up.  Only last week, my daughter came home from nursery clutching a picture of “Harry Potter” that she had painted for her Harry Potter-obsessed big brother.  The look on his face, a mixture of pride and elation that she had done that for him, was an absolute picture.

None of these special moments would have been possible if I had not gone through those few, dark months of HG. So, yes, I missed out on a period of my son’s life and he missed out on time with his mummy but, looking back, it was a relatively short period in the whole scheme of things.  In contrast, we as a family have gained so much in the long run and I have so much to be thankful for.

Charity Chick on the run - at least I look the part

A few weeks ago I wrote about finding a suitable goal to aim for following my knee surgery. (You can read about it here.) Thank you to everyone who came up with some great suggestions. I have chosen one which I think is achievable but challenging for me and will also raise money for a great cause - Cancer Research UK’s Race for Life.  

Date: 8 June

Venue: Sutton Park

Distance: 5K

OK, I am the first to admit that 5k doesn't sound very far - and it sounds even less when you convert it to miles!  But considering I wasn’t even allowed to run until a few weeks ago, and before that I hadn’t done any proper exercise in a very long time because of increasing problems with my unstable knee, believe me, this is a challenge for me. And what's more, I am pledging to run the entire way - no walking will be allowed!

Since January I have been going to the gym regularly, as well as doing short runs, as part of the rehab for my knee.  Things are definitely getting easier but I still have a way to go. My first few runs were done after dark so I wouldn't be spotted by anyone I know.  I am now feeling braver and am actually running in broad daylight. I have even purchased a pink hi-viz top (which frequently matches the colour of my cheeks) so there's no chance of anyone missing me now!  

The pink top was just the beginning though and since starting my new gym and running regime, I must have spent a small fortune on new kit - trainers (my old ones had holes in them), tops, leggings, and not one but three (!) undergarments essential for the female runner.  The old kit lurking, unloved and neglected, at the bottom of a drawer was rather tatty and, I am sorry to say, on the small side.  It had to go. At least now I look the part if nothing else and maybe the financial investment will act as an added incentive to keep at it!

Thank you to my good friend Julia for agreeing to take part with me. She has demonstrated her commitment already by purchasing new kit and embarking on the NHS Couch to 5K . So we are both good to go.  The countdown to the big event starts now!

And who knows where it will lead? Maybe this time next year I will be running 10k, a marathon or even taking part in a triathlon! Hmmm ... then again, maybe not!

If anyone else would like to join us on 8th June in Sutton Park, you would be more than welcome.

The challenge continues - what's the latest?

My Nine Months Of … campaign to raise awareness and money for Pregnancy Sickness Support continues apace.  Here’s a quick update on what I have been up to lately.

Raising money

I have now received my fee for lecturing midwifery students at Birmingham City University which I have donated to Pregnancy Sickness Support. Thanks to this, my Pamper Evening and generous donations from friends and family, my fundraising total so far is £248.

This is well over my original target but I would love to make it even more. So please do take a look at my fundraising page and consider making a donation.  Every little counts so any donation, no matter how big or small, would be very much appreciated.

Raising awareness

In the last few days I have spoken to one of the lovely midwives who looked after me when I was pregnant. She contacted me a few months ago, having seen an article in the local newspaper about my volunteering for Pregnancy Sickness Support, and asked for information leaflets about the charity to pass on to ladies struggling with pregnancy sickness.  She was very keen on my request to go and speak to all the North Birmingham community midwives and she is going to let me know when their next team meeting is so that I can join them. Result!

Mums In The Know Sutton Coldfield, who kindly welcomed me to one of their Play Dates, have also agreed to feature information on Pregnancy Sickness Support in the charity section of their website.  They would also like me to be one of their “Mums in the Spotlight” talking about my role as a mum, a solicitor and, of course, a volunteer for the Pregnancy Sickness Support. Double result!

Finally, my Nine Months Of … challenge and this blog were featured in this month's departmental update at the law firm where I work.

So with just two months left until the official end of the Nine Months Of… campaign, there are still plenty of things keeping me busy but I am still on the lookout for other opportunities and events to attend.  Please let me know if you are aware of any. Thank you.

Student midwives' lecture - delivered at last

On Friday 7 February 2014 I gave my long-anticipated lecture on hyperemesis gravidarum to sixty student midwives at Birmingham City University.  As a solicitor, I might not seem like the obvious choice to lecture on a midwifery course!  But I suffered from the condition during both my pregnancies and I am now a volunteer for the charity, Pregnancy Sickness Support (PSS), so I am probably more qualified than most.

My remit for the session was to share my own experiences in order to help the students understand the impact that hyperemesis has on the sufferer and her family and to discuss how midwives can best help anyone suffering from hyperemesis .

Since having my two children, I have a huge amount of admiration for midwives and the important role that they play in bringing new life into the world.  I imagine that many regard it as a privilege to be involved in one of the most precious moments that a family can experience.  However, sadly, they will also encounter loss and grief and they will need to show strength and compassion to support families through dark and tragic times. I believe it takes a very special person to take on this role.

It was not surprising then that the group I lectured were a really lovely bunch of ladies.  I had no problems engaging them in discussion of the case studies I had prepared and they were very willing to share any experience they already had of hyperemesis . 

During the session I spent time discussing the significant differences between hyperemesis and the "normal" pregnancy sickness that many people will be familiar with. My intention was to give an honest and personal account of what I went through and to highlight the support and resources available from Pregnancy Sickness Support.

I ended the session with five key messages for the students to remember:

• Hyperemesis is not morning sickness. It is not a normal part of pregnancy but a serious complication which is both mentally and physically debilitating.
• Hyperemesis requires proper treatment and support otherwise there are risks to mum and baby.
• Safe and effective medication is available.
• A midwife’s role is to believe, listen to and support the woman and to ensure she gets the medical treatment and support she needs. 
• Support, information and resources are available from Pregnancy Sickness Support.

From my own perspective, I felt the lecture went very well. That said, I was not expecting the round of applause I got at the end of the session!

I would like to thank Rachel and all of the students for giving me the opportunity to come and speak to the group. It was a real pleasure and I would be delighted to come again next year if the University will have me.  

If you have enjoyed reading my blog please sponsor me for the Nine Months of ... campaign here. You can find out more about the Nine Months of ... campaign here.  Thank you.